Tercapai hajat

In sept 2016...
I am not ready yet, but I know I have to force myself...How long do I have to wait till I am really ready? At least start with it, not properly, not completely but slowly.....Drastically change may turn me back to the old me ....

Early 2017...
Someone asked me...When I gonna wear something like my colleague is wearing? Kan cantik...Even though I was surprised and kinda annoyed with that question...I tried to hide it with fake smile and said I am not ready yet...It easier said than done. Hello...it is better I be like that than the old me. Definitely there were many challenges when we do something not fully hearted..The struggles are real....Sometimes I just wanna be the old me. But I have to be strong and keep going...

End 2017 till early 2018..
Eventhough I am still not completely changed but I tried to do something quite proper...But sometimes I just do what I wanna do. Anyway...it was quite funny when people said
""Eee...geramnya tengok u"
"Comelnya...." (Comel muka or badan mkin comel 😅😅😅)
"Muda 20 tahun" (Ko ingat aku tua sangatkah)
"Nampak lainlah"
"Makin berseri..." (I pakai lip balm yg ikut warna darah kak oi...nothing more)
"Makin comel..." (No point if you got more pimple 😰😰)
"La ..you ke...ingatkan our younger customer"
Well...all that were common...
Alhamdulillah if they really meant it...
But today it took me by surprise
When the senior grab my hand and shake it..
Hug me while saying my name 3 three times...
"... ke ... ke ... ke"
"Alhamdulillah ...hajat kak ...tercapai"
I just speechless for a moment
Then I asked...hajat apa?
"Ko tau lah...."
I guess I know why....
Yes, definitely I am happy coz by doing something I managed to make someone happy and fullfill her intention...
But I am really worried if she feel dissapointed when she saw me whenever I am not in the mood to do something properly....
Whateverlahkan
We live not for somebody else expectation etc....